Why Taking Care of Your Mom (or Grandma) Is More Important Than Ever
When’s the last time you made a mistake or did something that you were embarrassed about? Maybe you forgot someone's name or forgot to pay a bill and were charged late fees. Typically, we feel bad about these things for a day or so, and then the negative feelings fade away.
Now imagine that you made a mistake that cost you money, and not only were you ashamed about it, but you knew that if you told anyone about it, people you loved or respected might think you were’t capable of making decisions for yourself. Maybe those same loved ones would want to take some of your independence away.
That's the situation that many elders (people 65 years and older) face when they are the victim of a financial scam. There are new scams popping up every day, and many intentionally target vulnerable seniors. A senior that gets scammed could lose all of her savings and, in the worst cases, even her home.
At an event put on by the Financial Education Network (FEN) earlier this week, I learned all about senior-targeted financial scams. If you haven’t heard of FEN, it’s a network, spearheaded by the Office of the Treasurer of San Francisco and the Charles Schwab Foundation, consisting of several nonprofits and financial institutions that work toward connecting all San Franciscans to quality financial education.
Here’s what I learned: typical scams range from the simple (forging an elder’s signature, for example, or stealing wallets and mail) to the complex (conducting investment fraud, abusing Power of Attorney authorization, or creating fake charities targeted at the elderly). Here’s a full list of scams.
In EARN's financial services and financial coaching programs, we encourage our clients – we call them Savers – to let go of shame so they can move forward on their journey to prosperity. Sometimes this is done silently, but other times our Savers talk or share about their experience so others can benefit from their wisdom.
At our 2011 Asset Awards, Dametra, last year's featured Saver, encouraged this year's awardee, Julia, to let go of her pain and to move beyond it. “There is something about sharing our struggles publicly that frees us from them,” Dametra told Julia at the event. “Take in this experience – the love, the support, the generosity – and use it to propel you to wherever you want to go.”
My mom was a senior who needed some help in the final years of her life. She was an amazing mom, and my siblings and I were grateful to help her out with her finances and in other ways. When she started to need help she also experienced shame in losing her independence. I turned the tables by joking with her that she was like Paris Hilton: she could go out and spend money, and someone would pay her bills for her. Unfortunately – or perhaps fortunately for my mom – she didn't know who Paris Hilton was!
The first of the baby boomers turn 65 in 2011. The number of people age 65 and older will double between 2010 and 2050, with the number of those 85 and older increasing four-fold. This trend has been dubbed the Silver Tsunami. President Obama declared May 2011 Older Americans Month and has invited Americans of all ages to acknowledge the contributions of older generations during this month and throughout the year.
It's a fitting time to show your appreciation of your elders, from your parents or grandparents to a friend or co-worker, and all they have done for you. And make sure they’re prepared to recognize financial scams that may come their way.
Happy Older Americans Awareness Month!
